Children thrive on structure. That’s why Constructive Use of Time is an important Asset and valuable parenting tool that will help you develop happy, healthy, successful children and teens. Here are 3 Quick Tips to assist you.
1. Lay the foundation by having established rules, curfews, and discuss your expectations of behavior.
Sit down and determine what the rules and curfews are. Ask yourself questions like; do I need to limit the amount of time my kids spend on electronic media such as television, computers, cell phones or the like? Write it out. This will help you clearly identify your expectations and set boundaries and guidelines.
Next, have that discussion. Be open to input from your children after you have written out what you determined the rules to be. Keep in mind, the more you involve your son or daughter in establishing the rules and curfews, the easier it will be to enforce. Your teen may even surprise you. I know one parent who was going to set a curfew of 10:30 PM and her son said he thought his curfew should be 10 PM.
Make sure if you are a two parent home that both parents establish the rules and discuss expectations together. In a case where a single parent is living with the child’s grandparent(s) make sure that all caregivers in the home are part of the process. There is nothing more confusing to a child than having two or three sets of rules and expectations in the same home.
2. Give the day structure by developing a daily schedule or routine.
This helps your child develop time management and organizational skills; skills that many adults lack. Helping your child develop these skills will put them ahead of the game in school and later in life.
Some of the basics of a daily routine might include:
- Make bed every day
- Put dirty clothes in laundry
- Put away clean clothes
- Daily personal hygiene
- Breakfast
- One or more chores: dishes, trash out, lawn care…
Expand this during the school year to include:
- Set their own alarm clock
- Choose their school clothes the night before
- Have books and homework assignments in one spot
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Keep track of their homework assignments
3. Get them involved and keep them involved in sports or other activities.
- Attending a local sports camp is an excellent use of time and will give your son or daughter more self-esteem and confidence while building healthy friendships.
- Help your child develop some form of skill building and conditioning into their daily routine. Every summer afternoon I would shoot a basketball as part of my daily routine. I could hardly wait for my father to get home each day so I could try to beat him in our daily foul shooting contest. This also helps develop discipline.
- Suggest the buddy system, where your teen and a couple of their friends condition together. When my older brother was conditioning in July for football, he would include me in all his exercises and two-mile runs. Not only will they build great friendships but they will find themselves pushing each other to higher levels of performance. Now is a great time to plan your child or teen’s involvement for fall sports.
- Golf has become popular with teens and teaches leadership, confidence, courtesy, respect, discipline and honesty. Many area clubs have youth programs.
- Consider chess, art classes, gymnastics, martial arts, volunteering and so on. These traits will stay with them forever!
Kids build confidence and self-esteem by developing skills. Using these 3 Tips will help your children develop skills for a lifetime. There will be times when you get resistance. Expect it and stick to your agreements. If they say you are nagging or too strict, you are not, its called parenting. One day your children will appreciate that you have taught them Constructive Use of Time.
Larry Tracey, author of this article, is a parent and teen expert, who teaches success and leadership life skills. He is author of an award-winning book for teens, pre-teens and parents, titled The Secret of the CAN. Larry is founder of Youth4Youth and believes each student has the potential to be successful. Contact Larry Tracey at success@larrytracey.com or get more useful tips at www.youth4youth.org/blog